For Women and Men survivors of child sexual abuse

   Recovering from childhood sexual abuse is a difficult process.  In the beginning, it may seem to dominate all your thinking and actions. You may be so overwhelmed with feelings you believe it is impossible to act. 

   That's okay.  This book provides a process to follow in a gentle way at your own pace.

   The book's main purpose is to serve as a guideline to the healing process.  It will help you assess the damage, see how your life was affected, put you on the road to healing, and finally end up collecting dust on your bookshelf, because the abuse is simply part of your history, not an active part of your life. 

   Sections include:  coping, breaking silence, learning to trust yourself, understanding it wasn't your fault, anger, dealing with your family now, and moving on. Many of the exercises can be applied to other problem areas of life as well, or simply used as a method of personal growth.

   In addition, the book covers the ways people deal with past sexual abuse: forgetting, leaving the body, self-mutilation, compulsive eating, alcoholism, suicide attempts, repeating the abuse, shoplifting, perfectionism, creating new personalities, and sleeping excessively.

From The Courage To Heal Workbook:

--"Many of us have been too busy running, surviving, and just getting by to consider the possibility of nurturing ourselves.  But even if you're just starting out, I encourage you to take as many small steps toward self-care as you possibly can.  It's the beginning of loving yourself."

--"…many problems in your life are the natural result of an abusive childhood, not some bizarre quirk you invented on your own…  You may be devastated when you see all the ways abuse has affected and limited you…  As you realize that your adult life has been ravaged because of someone else's selfish acts, you become furious at what was done to you."

--"All coping mechanisms have an inherent logic and serve an important function.  Underlying each coping mechanism is a need.  If you discard a coping mechanism without finding another way to understand and meet the underlying need, the change won't last."

--"When you make the commitment to heal, you risk losing much of what is familiar.  As a result, one part of you may want to heal while another resists change."

--"Most children endure terrible atrocities without ever being able to tell anyone.  Secrecy increases feelings of shame in the victim and allows the abuse to continue unchecked.  For most abused children, isolation and silence are a way of life."

--"Every survivor I've ever met has battled with shame, with the awful sense that there was something wrong with them deep down inside that caused the abuse.  Although this belief is universally held, it is universally false."

--"Some things in life are unforgivable.  Period.  Child sexual abuse is one of them. You don't have to forgive your abuser in order to heal."