Jekyll And Hyde
Why do I want to stay in a relationship that makes me so unhappy?
I have been with my boyfriend for two years. Over the last few months the relationship has rapidly declined. We are spending less and less time together (his choice), and the time we do spend together we argue about the way he is treating me.
One minute he is loving and caring, the next cold and hurtful. His confusing behavior is causing me to act out of character. I feel I am turning into an emotional wreck.
My partner now says he doesn’t love me and doesn’t want to be with me because of my irrational behavior. He told me this two weeks after booking a family holiday to Spain for us and his parents, which he still plans to take us on.
Mornings are my weakest time. I end up phoning him only to be told to leave him alone. I must be crazy because I still want to work things out with him. Yet I know there is no chance.
I need to hold things together for the sake of my three children from a previous marriage. I want to be free of the emotional turmoil and start to rebuild my life.
Sabrina
Sabrina, it doesn’t matter whether your boyfriend is acting from some diabolical plan, treats everyone this way, or is completely clueless about other people’s feelings. The end result is the same. Pain and confusion.
With three children, you probably feel your options are limited. But think about what you are showing them.
It is not right to manipulate others this way, or to allow yourself to be manipulated. Show your children what is right. Start building a life without him.
Wayne
(From the column for the week of November 1, 1999)
